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Writer's pictureHelen B

My Nana Joan ❤️

Where to start....Cycle 2 hasn't been as bad as the last, the usual sickness, pain and fatigue have ensued. But week 3 was actually manageable and as a family all 18 of us went to Centerparcs. We had a wonderful week but towards the end we knew my Nana Joan (who was in hospital) had been getting slowly worse despite treatment.


So early Friday morning me and mam went to the hospital and requested we be allowed to bring her home, to spend her last days in the place she'd spent her life, from a newly married young woman to celebrating her 91st birthday; and what a life....


As a young woman she had a few jobs, she worked at Hintons, then a dress makers before going to work at the steel works. It was there she met my grandad, Bill. "Me and my friend Joy both saw this tall dark handsome fella, Joy said she fancied him, but he kept looking at me, so I had him away". They courted for 3 years before they married and moved into the house she would call home for over 65 years. They had Billy then Lynn (mam), followed by us 3 grandchildren (Gary, Scott & Me) and 9 great grandchildren. She was the matriarch of our family with only kind words to say about everyone, and no matter how hard she was pushed (by Scott!) she never professed to having a favourite. She smiled all the time, even when she was having bloods done or being fiddled about with in hospital, she was always smiling. It was infectious, you couldn't help but smile back at her.


Without knowing it she was one of the funniest people you'd ever meet, so many of my stories have her in them because she has been a huge part of my life, she's shaped me in so many ways and a lot of my values come from her directly or by proxy through my mam. When I was angry at someone she'd say "they're more to be pitied than scolded our Helen" and she was often right. When I was sad she'd say "there's always a rainbow after the rain our Helen" and she was always taking care of us, I remember once I was in trouble for drinking alcohol when I was too young to do so, so Nana Joan gave me a tot of Brandy to make me feel better!! She always made me laugh, we were talking about her brothers wife and she said "you remember Betty don't you, ugly woman she was, but like our Franky said 'you don't look at the mantle piece when you're stoking the fire!'" She could have been a comedian, but she never knew how funny she was, she'd always say "why are you lot laughing at me!"


We lost our grandad age 65 so we feel very fortunate to have had her for another 25+ years. But like most people feel when they lose someone, it's never enough. She was ready to go, she told us. Our parting gift to her was to bring her home and love her in the place she belonged, the place her husband died, the place she gave birth to her children. Her home. You can't put a price on that.


Nana Joan, our matriarch, our nana, our Queen ❤️




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michellespencer77
michellespencer77
20 jun 2023

Aww how lovely Helen what an amazing lady x

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